Trying to understand why something that seems so easy is just so difficult.

Yeah, really, I’m wondering. Usually I have this plan that i want really stuck inside my head, I’m already aiming at it, but then the moment i decide to do this plan, I’m just down with some blockage. There’s just something that’s not working.

Maybe I’m a perfectionist. I want to do something really nice, but then because I’m always changing things here and there, I never get things done.

I’m stuck in a dilemma of where I want the best of everything. 

I can’t remember how many things I’ve tried myself, but i always get things halfway done. I opened up a blog years ago, and just recently, I’ve opened up another blog on local art. I joined DJ-ing halfway, and i wanted to concentrate on being a producer. I had taken an aviation course in school, with in mind previously, that i wanted to be a pilot, but after realizing that it’s not my passion, i decided not to be so much. Then i just thought, what was my passion anyway? 

 I confessed being a dreamer, and have great ambitions, and its not that it’s not possible but because I want to do so much stuffs, i can’t even concentrate on what i want anymore. 

Is there a sickness to describe this? Is it fickle-mindedness. Maybe.

I’m taking a step back to try and figure out again what is it that i want to be. I hope to record the journey I’m taking from now on. 


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